More Bedtime Poems for the Undergraduate Soul

A collection of poetry written by a common student dutifully observing the descent into madness of being stuck in school before the holidays. Said student says that every good undergrad should have this book of poetry to fall asleep to. Reviewers say that this book is a must read for everyone who is a student between the ages 16 and 125. If you are younger or older than the recommended ages, you are at risk of being infected by Angstitis, a disease that brings forth your inner angsty humors and cause it to boil forth in a collection of pimples also known as acne. Read at your own risk.

The Paradox

No job without experience.

No experience without a job.

Campus Cat

I bet that caught your attention

there’s a good deal of you here who’s

got this feline attraction

Yes, there is a campus cat

And needless to say, we’ve made him quite fat

He’s not here for much education

though he’s the most literate cat in his feline division

He’s got a black fuzzy hat tipped over his brow

A white flared suit, and my friends call him Cow.

Campus Dog

There is no campus dog

We’ve only campus squirrels here

And this is their turf.

Ode to Organic Chemistry: the sequel

Aromatic rings, aromatic rings

The only one I can list is Miss Benzene.

Coffee 

Come here. Observe.

What you see over yonder is a wild undergrad.

A curious species with curiouser habits

Upon the hour they flock to waterholes

and converge at its edge

hovering hordes and fantastic pourings of bored

fresh

men

Then one by one they come to life

Pulse performing, some sort of pagan ritual dance

and then they chant

over and over they

chant

the mantra of their spirit that gives them time and sends their pulses racing back to life

Soylattepleaseanddoubleexpressoholdtheice

“aymen”

Elicit

Fire

There’s a fire across my campus

And everyone is getting burned

Our veins are bubbling rampant

each awaiting our own turn

It’s the days of Final Judgement

Once again prepare the urns

Every single soul in my class

So, I set a fire on my own ass

for the

Midterms.

Midterms.

Midterms.

Thanksgiving

Tipsy, turvy, topsy swirly

drizzle on that gravy turkey

rice and pies and vines and knives

I will take my grades on ice

An Ode to Organic Chemistry

O’ organic chemistry, you’ve lost my attraction

It was all fun until we reached the reactions

We tested our relationship and I guess I failed

I was on the right track until the bonds derailed

I guess you wouldn’t be all that hard

If only life followed the rules on Mars.

 

Shh He’s Sleeping

Quiet! The kid next to you is sleeping

Poor guy, he hasn’t taken a nap since last Tuesday

Last Tuesday?

Yeah, Remember Last Tuesday the Due Date?

I must have slept through last Tuesday!

Quiet! He’s the val. I need him to sleep through this Wednesday.

London Bridge

London Bridge is falling down

It’s been skewing towards the right for the entire semester

London Bridge is falling down

It hasn’t looked this bad since I called the town preacher

London Bridge is falling down

All the king’s horses and all the king’s men

Need to be checked on once and again

Here. Here. here. Here!

And the engineers?

Sir, I’m afraid they have all disappeared!

Poetry in DNA

The greatest poem I ever read

was found in my Genetics textbook

tucked in between chromosomes and pictures of mutated flies

“The reciprocal exchange of broken parts”

A Lesson to the Youngun’s

It  is really that simple, like passing a poo

Don’t go to college until you know what to do.

Scorched

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11 thoughts on “More Bedtime Poems for the Undergraduate Soul

              1. Of course , everybody does that…. And I respect poets above all
                But I lost my work(quots and poems) so there is not much saved ones these days …
                Looking forward
                And thankyou for your kindness iam glad that I met you here somehow 🙂

                Liked by 1 person

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